September 2024 Newsletter

Make the Choice That Feels Right For You.

Reframing the “I Can’t” Statement.

Reading time 3.5 minutes

Most of you will be back at work by now, back in the job you hate, (yuk) feeling like you can’t do anything to change your situation. I get it.

What if I told you that your “I can’t” statement holds you back more than you realize?

Let me break this down in simple terms.

When you say “I can’t,” you’re giving up before you even try. It’s like you’re handing over control of your life to something or someone else.

Here’s the thing - you have so much more power than you think. Instead of saying “I can’t”, try thinking about what you choose to do or not do. For example, when you say, “I can’t quit my job,” what you’re saying is, “I’m choosing to stay in my current job for now.” See the difference?

It puts you back in control. This might sound like a minor change, but it can make a big difference in how you see your life and the choices you have.

When you own your decisions, you see more possibilities.

Let’s say you’re thinking about starting a side hustle, but you keep telling yourself, “I can’t do that, I don’t have the skills”.

Try reframing it to, “I’m choosing to focus on learning new skills before starting a side hustle.”

This way, you’re not shutting down the idea completely. Instead, you’re giving yourself a path forward.

I know what you’re thinking.

“This all sounds great, but how does it help me in real life?”

Well, let me tell you a story about Joe (not his real name for privacy purposes).

Joe was a lot like you. He hated his warehouse job, felt stuck, and was always saying things like, “I can’t get a better job” or “I can’t go back to school.”

He was referred to me by a friend. To cut a long story short, I introduced him to the idea of reframing.

Changing the “I can’t” statement.

At first, Joe thought it was nonsense.

I understand. I convinced him to at least try it, to which he reluctantly did.

Instead of saying, “I can’t get a better job,” he started saying, “I’m choosing to improve my skills to get a better job.”

Instead of “I can’t go back to school,” he said, “I’m choosing to explore online learning options that fit my schedule.”

It wasn’t easy at first. Joe told me he had to catch himself every time he said “I can’t.”

Slowly, he saw changes.

He signed up for some free online courses in his spare time. He updated his resume and started applying for different jobs.

About six months later, Joe had learned enough to apply for a better position at a different company.

And guess what? He got the job!

It wasn’t his dream job, but it was a step up, with better pay and more learning opportunities.

Joe’s story shows that changing how you talk to yourself can lead to genuine changes in your life. It’s not magic - it still takes work and effort. But by reframing your “I can’t” statements, you open yourself up to possibilities you might not have seen before.

So, how can you do this in your own life?

Here are some simple steps:

1. Pay attention when you say “I can’t.” Catch yourself.

2. Ask yourself, “What am I choosing here?” Be honest with yourself.

3. Reframe your statement to reflect your choice. Instead of “I can’t,” say “I’m choosing to...”

4. Think about what small step you could take towards what you want.

Maybe it’s looking up online courses, updating your resume, or just talking to someone who has the sort of job you want.

5. Take that small step. Remember, you’re in control of your choices.

It’s not about pretending everything is easy or that you can do anything overnight, it’s not.

It’s about recognizing that you have more power and more choices than you might think.

The next time you catch yourself saying “I can’t,” stop and think.

What are you choosing?

What small step could you take to move in a different direction?

Remember, you’re the author of your own story. You might not change everything at once, but you can always choose to take a step forward.

So, what are you waiting for? What small choice can you make today to change your story? Until next month, stay positive. That's it from me for another month. I look forward to catching up in October.

In the meantime be kind to yourselves.

Remember - Life is short.

Stay healthy and do what you do best.

P.S. Here is my latest page of content:- Why-do-people-change-jobs.html